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Thread: Hi Everyone - Andy here

  1. #1
    Our Man in Penang's Avatar
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    Post Hi Everyone - Andy here

    My name is Andy and I'm 42 years old, married (but not for much longer) to a 38 year old Chinese Malaysian SAHM with whom I have a 13-year old daughter (at least I'm pretty sure she's mine). I currently live in Penang, Malaysia, but again, not sure for how much longer.

    My family is from Ireland and the Isle of Man, but for various reasons related to my fathers job, I was born in Yorkshire, England. I am a qualified project manager working in the Oil and Gas industry, specifically Energy Trading Risk Management and work all over the world as an independent consultant undertaking short-term projects (typically 3 - 6 months) for major energy companies.

    Primarily I work in Geneva, Zurich, Zug, Essen, London and Singapore. When I'm in Europe, my home is Port Erin on the Isle of Man, where my mothers family are from and still reside. I rent an apartment in Penang, Malaysia and prefer to spend the winters here if I can. When in Penang I like to swim, sail (dinghy's and yachts), snorkel and I'm learning how to scuba dive.

    I didn't know MGTOW existed until about 2-months ago when I was looking for solutions to my marital problems and wondering why the beautiful, adoring, slim, vibrant wife I had married in 2000 had turned into a fat, lifeless, brain dead, soulless, irrational bitch who would no longer put out.

    Obviously, as a normal nice guy bloke with a good job, great future, etc. I naturally assumed the problem was at least partly (if not entirely) my fault, but I was thinking rationally and couldn't see how that could possibly be. I now realise that I was choking on the last dregs of the blue-pill that I had been chewing happily up until then.

    I started off asking the question "Why have I been friend-zoned by my wife" (this being the modern internet vernacular), which led me to a thread on 4Chan's /adv/ advice board, where one anonymous poster was explaining the whole rationale behind MGTOW, I read the thread with growing interest and confusion, because while my rational mind could understand the logic of what the poster was saying, my blue-pill programming was attempting to stop me absorbing this.

    I slept on it and in the morning, had clarity. MGTOW explained the reason for my wife's behaviour in pretty much every single context. So I started pouring over everything I could find, watching YouTube videos (Karen Straughan, Sandman, etc.), reading about PUA's (Neil Straus' - The Game) and finally ended up here at the MGTOW Forums lurking and reading everything I thought might be relevant.

    After a couple of weeks, I decided that enough-is-enough and had it out with my wife about her behaviour (but mentioning nothing about MGTOW or what had caused my revelation), good god! talk about rationalisation hamster overdrive, her's started running at light speed. I got it all, crying, shaming, blaming, complete avoidance of any blame on her part, etc., etc., basically the entire gamut of emotion and irrationality that is woman.

    Previously, I would have done the nice guy thing and apologised and blah, blah, blah, wuss! but not that day!
    Although I was somewhat diplomatic about it, I basically said:

    "Shape up, start putting out, lose weight, quit your bitching and get a job or fuck off!"


    She did and neither of us have spoken a word since, that was 5-weeks ago. Since then I've spent the weekend in Pattaya, Thailand as an act of contempt to my and a final repudiation of both my marriage vows (which I honoured until she reneged), but more importantly to crush the last vestiges of my blue pill self. Best hour and 1,500 Baht I've ever spent.

    So that is my Road to MGTOW story and I've fully swallowed and digested my red pill and there is no way I am going back. I am getting the groundwork for divorce but it's not something I can do while I am physically present in Malaysia as my wife's uncle is the Chief Minister of Penang (a bit like the governor of a US State) and I'm worried that I would get shafted with a bit of political interference if I filed the petition here in Malaysia. Why my wife hasn't served me yet, I have no idea. Rationalisation hamster still on the spin-cycle I guess.

    Anyway, sorry for the long post, but I just wanted to give you an introduction that demonstrated the seriousness of my intention, I know that some here have been MGTOW before it even had a name and I'm in the process of reading "Book of Zed The Zen Priest - The Collected works of wisdom".

    Not sure what else to say really, just thanks for reading.
    Last edited by Nacho Vidal; 10-02-14 at 06:07 PM. Reason: removed surname.

  2. #2
    hasmat's Avatar
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    Welcome. Nice intro!

  3. #3
    Nacho Vidal's Avatar
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    Thanks Andy.

    On a different note, is that username your real name? If so and you want it changed to something more anonymous then just let me know.
    Support MGTOW Forums, go GOLD

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    Demosthenes's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nacho Vidal View Post
    Thanks Andy.

    On a different note, is that username your real name? If so and you want it changed to something more anonymous then just let me know.
    ^^^ I recommend not using your real name as well.

    Welcome.

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    fairi5fair's Avatar
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    Welcome!

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    corvair61's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by andy View Post
    I've fully swallowed and digested my red pill and there is no way I am going back

    Welcome.

    Damn, music to my ears..........I have a couple of friends that I wish would finally say those words.....

    Quote Originally Posted by andy View Post
    "Shape up, start putting out, lose weight, quit your bitching and get a job or fuck off!"
    You gave her options.....what a gentleman.............she would not have done the same......cunts.....
    Last edited by Nacho Vidal; 10-02-14 at 06:08 PM.

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    MisterPho's Avatar
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    Good intro, welcome.

  8. #8
    TheDisgruntledGentleman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by andy View Post
    I didn't know MGTOW existed until about 2-months ago when I was looking for solutions to my marital problems and wondering why the beautiful, adoring, slim, vibrant wife I had married in 2000 had turned into a fat, lifeless, brain dead, soulless, irrational bitch who would no longer put out.
    I assure you, that I, and many other members here, have empathy for that...

    Welcome
    Last edited by Nacho Vidal; 10-02-14 at 06:08 PM.

  9. #9
    zed's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheDisgruntledGentleman View Post
    Originally Posted by andy.bowman
    I didn't know MGTOW existed until about 2-months ago when I was looking for solutions to my marital problems and wondering why the beautiful, adoring, slim, vibrant wife I had married in 2000 had turned into a fat, lifeless, brain dead, soulless, irrational bitch who would no longer put out.
    I assure you, that I, and many other members here, have empathy for that...

    Welcome
    I don't mean to come off as a prick, but the simple answer to that question is -

    "Because you married her."

    Welcome to the forum, Andy.

  10. #10
    Our Man in Penang's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by zed View Post
    I don't mean to come off as a prick, but the simple answer to that question is -

    "Because you married her."
    You're not coming off as a prick Zed, I know, because I'm reading your book.

    What you say is quite correct though. I didn't put the hamster in her head, it was there from birth, encoded in her genes, sleeping in the corner of its cage until I married her and gradually that hamster spun up his wheel and destroyed my wife, my life and my marriage.

    If I could turn back time and undo "I do" I would, but I can't. All I can do is pick up the pieces of my life and Go My Own Way.

    In my calmer moments, I don't even blame her, because I now know that NAWALT is a lie, because at some point sooner or later they all change and the hamster starts-a-spinning.

    The only universal truth is AWALT.

  11. #11
    Johnny Smoggins's Avatar
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    Good intro. Welcome aboard. Every man ought to experience Pattaya at least once!

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    Our Man in Penang's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Johnny Smoggins View Post
    Good intro. Welcome aboard. Every man ought to experience Pattaya at least once!
    I'll probably go back when I am more at ease with myself. To be honest Pattaya can be a bit intimidating for a first timer and my reasons for going there were not personal pleasure, but more of a revenge fuck against my wife.

    Having said that, I had a very enjoyable time with a pretty, petite but straight-forward young lady of about 18 who knew why I was there knew how to deal with me.

    I think the key was going in the middle of the afternoon and being completely sober.

  13. #13
    The Running Man's Avatar
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    Welcome. You don't seem to be too worried about the divorce. Is she aware of your intentions?

  14. #14
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    Welcome to the forums Our Man. Great intro and nice to meet you...

  15. #15
    Reverend Henry Kane's Avatar
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    Welcome to the forums.

  16. #16
    Our Man in Penang's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Running Man View Post
    Welcome. You don't seem to be too worried about the divorce. Is she aware of your intentions?
    That's a bloody good question, but the honest answer is I have no idea. I made absolutely clear the fact that if she didn't get her shit together then it was over, but I'm not sure that she gets it or even knows what to do with the information. She and the kid are staying with her parents about 4 km away, so she's effectively living in the same four walls as when she was a teenage, except she's got a teenage daughter with her as well.

    Certainly if I'd done this to a western girl I would have expected papers to be served almost immediately, but with the Chinese I'm not so sure. They have this "face" thing which rules everything, so she might not have even told her parents why she's living at home again. Here in Malaysia they are still operating on a form of Marriage 1.0 in that there are all of the moral and traditional pressures for both sexes (no pre-marital sex, children only within marriage, marriage for live, divorce is socially frowned upon, etc.)

    Equally, there is the reality that she was thrown out of the marital home for not fulfilling her role as a wife. I never beat here, never shamed her in public, was in ideal "blue pill" husband in every way, but she didn't live up to the role of the wife as is required in their community.

    From my perspective, time works in my favour, so I am letting her sulk or whatever and in the meantime I am acting in terms of ensuring that I have control of all of my assets and that I can use them fully in the event of a divorce.

    Given my international lifestyle, she would find it very difficult to enforce either alimony or child support on me anyway. In which case I will just keep sending her money for the kid (which I've been giving her monthly for years anyway) and she can whistle for the rest.

    I didn't stop fulfilling my marital duties, she did. I didn't walk out of our marriage, she did.

    To put it bluntly, why should I pay for it if I'm not fucking it?

  17. #17
    Bohocasavant's Avatar
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    Nice intro, pull up a chair and make yourself comfortable.

  18. #18
    NoMoreMrNiceGuy's Avatar
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    Welcome. Nice intro.

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    Silvestroyer's Avatar
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    Very nice intro, and I am surprised to discover that marriages don't last even there in SE Asia, "traditionalism's last hope" (Traditionalism's Last Hope - YouTube)

    It seems that the western virus is spreading fast...

  20. #20
    ubermensch's Avatar
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    Any funny ideas I had about finding a foreign bride are now toast.

    Welcome.

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